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Musings

The Importance of Community

The Importance of Community

February 22, 2024

We all exist in communities, our country, our ethnic groups, our gender, our family. Each of these identities shapes and molds us throughout our life. Our relationships with each community is complex we are given opportunities, expectations and sometimes traumas. Most of this is unconscious, we often don’t know how a community has truly affected […]

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Flying Too Close To The Sun: Hubris

Flying Too Close To The Sun: Hubris

May 4, 2022

Are you familiar with the myth of Icarus? The boy that wanted to fly? He constructed wings made of wax and took to the sky, he wanted to challenge the gods. And, you know what? It worked. For a time. But then he got cocky and he flew higher and higher. So high that he […]

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Taking Responsibility: Overcoming the Victim Mentality

Taking Responsibility: Overcoming the Victim Mentality

April 4, 2022

It is so easy to be a victim, to be somebody who life just happens to. There you are, going about your day, and the world just slaps you down. It is so easy to blame, to find fault in the world around you. It’s easy to sit back, and talk about everything that’s wrong. […]

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Filling Your Own Cup: The Importance of Self-Love

Filling Your Own Cup: The Importance of Self-Love

March 4, 2022

When I was younger I got the advice, “You have to love yourself before you can love someone else.” At the time I thought this was stupid. To me, the only way I could experience love was from another person. I thought that I needed someone else in order to make me feel whole. I […]

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The Aversion to Happiness: Self-Sabotage

The Aversion to Happiness: Self-Sabotage

February 4, 2022

I am reading a book right now called The Big Leap by Gay Hendricks, it’s about how when we are just on the cusp of getting what we want we often pull ourselves back down into where we were. Think about it, have you ever been on the verge of a great success only to […]

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Find your Tribe: Prevention vs. Promotion Focused

Find your Tribe: Prevention vs. Promotion Focused

January 4, 2022

As you move down your healing path. You will encounter other people that do not know how to adapt to the changes that you’ve made. This can be very painful because some who were your closest friends are now your biggest detractors. In fact, some of your friends will want you to stay just how […]

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Mourning our Lost Selves

Mourning our Lost Selves

December 4, 2021

Whenever you make a change parts of you die. To make room for new growth the leaves of a tree have to fall to the ground and rot, turning into compost. It is the same for us, as we let go of old patterns, old relationships, and old thoughts. There is a mourning process that […]

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Giving What’s Needed: Communal vs. Exchange Relationships

Giving What’s Needed: Communal vs. Exchange Relationships

November 4, 2021

I spend a lot of time on this blog writing about unhealthy relationship patterns. Today I figured that I’d write about two relationship patterns that are actually pretty healthy. The exchange relationship and the communal relationship. Of course, like anything, these patterns can become unhealthy if taken to an extreme. But, by and large, relating […]

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Forging your Life: Massive Action

Forging your Life: Massive Action

September 4, 2021

Many people in my generation horribly underestimate the work required to make things happen. We are often too focused on trying to work smarter that we forget how to work harder. Success does not come easy, it takes hard work, discipline, and a lot of sacrifice. Last week we talked about passion, the willingness to burn […]

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Projection: I’m Not Who You Think I Am

Projection: I’m Not Who You Think I Am

August 4, 2021

We are all out of touch with reality.  The most mindblowing thing that I learned during my time studying Neuroscience was that the brain creates our reality. It takes in sensory data, sights, sounds, tastes, feeling sensations, smells: and generates a model of the world around us. This is the reality that we think we see […]

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Mutually Assured Destruction: Codependency

Mutually Assured Destruction: Codependency

July 4, 2021

When considering a relationship there’s an adage in Alcoholics Anonymous that states: “Well, in your first year of sobriety, buy a plant, at the end of that year, buy a pet, and IF… at the end of that second year, they are both still alive, that would be when I would recommend starting a relationship.” […]

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